I published the rest of the story, OLD MARY AND THE
BEAST, in last week's blog. But I did not
announce it- for these reasons:
It’s 100 pages (with 4 paintings).
It’s sensually dark and violent at times. Though, that’s just human nature, and Nature!
It’s a story for someone spiritually mature and
aesthetically determined- it’s a huge lyric prose poem, I think- In the form of
a novella, mostly.
Find here today, the conclusion of this story about
‘identity’- social, political, sexual, religious and economic. (With a small
reflection on the new role of Women- I dare- but then, a berdashe does not care a wit...+)
Historical and non--
this Conclusion is in the form of an artist’s musings on color!
154.
SPIRIT OF DARK MATTER 8: Dark Spirit Backs the Light
Dark Spirit Backs the Light. Thus perhaps, by such a gift, we see/experience--shapes, colors; emotions, ideas, etc. Thus perception is possible. Still implied here is a conjuring of dark spirits. Not evil, per se. Rather, here we engage the Spirit of Dark Matter.
An important influence in my studies has been the 'Genius Loci,' the Spirit of Place(s), and through that the engorged idea of a World Spirit or Soul—Gaia or Great Old Man. Here is something more than a rational extrapolation that posits ‘if places and objects are animated by some kind of spiritual presence or incarnation, then Dark Matter also might share such vitality.’ Here is regaled an encounter with such or other entities from a vast universe as they might be perceived through the vales of human perception...
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VII.
ADDENDUM
Below find thirteen pages by Dr. Jack Hartley. found among Mother Mary’s papers.
CHAPTER 13
Jack Says:
Steam of Consciousness Streams to the Sea,
+
From Priesthood to Sorcery-- And Back Again...
Color has its own existence. Before light and energy to carry it. Before matter to bounce off... All that is subsequent to color. One must be able to draw out this spirit or essence of color. It's what one does with it that matters-- this emanation of God, like all creation. For want of better language... But it's best not to speak of such things at all. Even that word 'God' is crude blasphemy compared to an experience of it, to the thing itself...
Color has its own existence. I discovered this at the Achekale, the Pale Castle, the first time in eastern Turkey on the Soviet border. That worn-out, brown landscape-- violet circle of flowers around the red-yellow-white flame of the sacred fire released its color from that ritual for the dragon of that place. Six weeks of hitchhiking across the U.S. from California, Europe then the transportation systems of Turkey to the Soviet Border, East of Kars. Color was released and we still dance to its whipping undulations. He called me a white wizard. How different it all is than white or black--the magics. How much more a delight its variations, its colors, its terrors…
Dance with me for a bit as I recount my spell. Our spell-- that will save or destroy the world. Walk with me along this forest Path so this knowledge may pass on for the comfort of mystics and a warning to the world
The dignity of our age is to improve the world--to try to perfect it. But there have been other eras also with dignity and character. Hunter-gatherer nomads ran with the Gods for the first millennia of human consciousness. 'Civilized' groups participated in rites of sacrifice and the mysteries to help maintain creation, along with the crops and flocks, Then the Modern Age, the rule of reason—science, technology and capitalism. Now we begin something else… Now we have the power to destroy everything without better controls on greed and brutality than before.
Color has its own existence. This is how I conjured its sympathy:
Childhood, School and Metaphor. The Monastery and the Sacrament—meditation--where the real human adventure--states of perception—are recognized and pursued.
Enormous rain drops fall-- seem an inch across, splatter across the dusty cement of our hilltop Patio near our small pond--we could see for miles from that hill--The night sky crystalline black--and the smell of rain day or night in our desert that runs gulch and gullies deep. Arizona summer monsoons reach across California and Nevada in big rain years.
Curious what was instilled in me then in those hills, canyons, sage, chaparral with its ticks and deer, coyotes and pumas, quail dove and passing sacred geese. Sycamore and oaks, wild oats green and golden blond stalks, flowers that swim to the clatter of cottonwood leaves, whispering of leaves and grass…
I first encountered the psyche of nature there, the spirit of the place, whispers of the world's divine energies. Our psyche is conjured of the same stuff. Before I was in school I was hungry for culture and fascinated by art. I think I largely ignored school, got by, nothing wrong with education. As a matter of fact, I'm all for it. But so much energy goes into socialization--and socializing. So much time, just socializing. But in spite of the passage of times, that character of where I was raised, out away from the suburbs and … away from much human passage at all-- though, Wells Fargo used to run their stage-coaches past our place and through its air and remarkable natural herbal fragrance. In autumn I was there to admire the jet trails across the clouds and blue refractions…
…was grounded early in the earth charkas. Exposed to its mysteries. Psychic energies that are the ambience and means of passage through… but those are stories of early exploration of the physics of my body and the body of creation. One's own inner vastness and powers… That comes from the furthest dark matter of deep, deepest outer space…
Proportion is the metaphysical exercise. It does not matter how much yoga or asceticism, except it be enough, perfectly enough for some purpose, for one's personal chemistry so to speak…
My intention is the intention of high religion: To save the world. From what, or for what, is not always perfectly clear, except that there are certain problems that threaten the biosphere--no not just that--there are real problems that threaten Godhead itself! In the world, as in you and each part the whole… God makes the world out of himself, no words to describe. … not existence but consciousness. Can it be that the divine spirit i.e. what we experience as pure consciousness can be threatened? Would existence still be, if consciousness were finally eradicated--the contemporary technocratic system has reduced human experience to a much narrower and pragmatic materialism.
We are now in the forth age. The most dangerous…
Freedom, freedom from gangsters would be nice, especially from those who are always waving the flag or shaking the Cross.
You know the problems, environmental problems, issues of justice. Nature has rights as well as people. Dear God, there are too many people…
In any case, I stray from our story:
Huge raindrops drink up the dry, miniscule cavities in the cement and red brick Patio-- summer monsoon. Seasonal rain in this desiccated country. That is the 'the way,' that is the relationship. That's my youth. Things like that. That’s the value that I learned…
Then I went to school/university. I was very impressed with writing, classical music and art. And biology, of course.
Then the monastery: Different values there-- I remember Brother Benedict hugely sweeping down in full monastic garb of black cape over black Benedictine robes of obedience and stability that cold Advent night to greet my parents and I with my suitcase.
I thought there was a love of art there. The love of art there was more tolerance, a romantic fervor in some cases. More than that really, but always second to the lifestyle. The value there was their lifestyle. The Hours, silence, rhythms of waiting, cycles of prayer and spiritual reading, relationships of quality, a system of authority that allows for personal growth along a particular channel to the sea... Return to the origin …splendor--doesn't usually feel splendid. But there are moments of vaulting splendor and unqualified, non-physical intimacy.
This dissertation marches along a timeline, but some of the moments along the way engorge to meanings that make life bearable, even enthused-- (Little bits of that tied to a myth and/or sacred scripture and tradition and the offer to help raise your children and the promise of salvation, --release from guilt, failure, passion, is the backbone of modern pop religion.) Real Salvation is always at hand every moment. Nobody owns it. Access is the issue. Most don't have a clue, all have the capacity for it. 'The Kingdom really is at hand.' We live in the presence of God, if you like. Every moment is the end time. --and begins with unspeakable sentience. But few want it that much right away… until each realizes one's need for it. It is as much a part of oneself, the character of self, as is the heart or brain any other organ or appendage.
But the monasteries are fragile places--can't handle much variation from their norms in a hostile culture. But at least they maintain a strong core of singular beauty with all its facets to catch the light. Easily abused...
Variation seems to be the nature of life. Expansion and maintenance. The monastic vision is to maintain and conserve--that one may know… and know deeply the source of life.
Well, that's the extent of my concern for the current expression of our human project. Now pre-imminent drives and personal gen loci demand my attention:
Cut these knotted thoughts. Must get free of the intrigues of thinking… and the flesh.
Our experiment, a response to these horrors has produced some remarkable occasions, horrors of their own. Co-incidents if you like, that alter the world's course. But so far seem to have affected the cancer of human existence very little. There is still some hope from the little ones. Categories of little things like virus and bacteria. Or such self-destructions as cancer--A firm mystery that there's still hope in tragedy.
Sex Magic, Tantra and the Holy Spirit. All turned to the service of the world; the Great Basin and the disciple (be wary of disciples…) Freedom (The fiction of freedom?) Freedom to channel all one's personal energies into service. Freedom to do what's right with the experience and hope for the Holy Spirit to channel those energies in its will--It has been my helping spirit after all, my familiar, most powerful magic after all…
Am I responsible for the disasters? My bishop and my father dead from massive heart attacks, our family's house up in flames, the hotel in Mazatlan gutted, the studio in Venice, California, leveled to the ground, the Navaho boy--dead as he is, and the near sex of it-- Then, the Circle K across the street: All inexplicably destroyed when touched by the poisonous drink of this spell. Well, no, of course they are just co-incidents after all…
The magic and sorcery is just spin off from an essential processes of enlightenment, of Kundalini yoga, from the earth chakras seeking union with of the celestial, Shivite sky chakras. So it is with science, compared to the core mysticism of the human quest--for 'a light that casts no shadow'--the ground and foundation of all things…
Some of these explorations stray into formats of popular fiction as well as the more elite realms of art and critical theory to discover among other issues, how both popular and critical compassion is defeated by other less altruistic forces.
…Of concern is the wholesale destruction of the world’s natural resources and the sacred, wild places so important to human life both physically and spiritually. Witness the destruction of the rainforests worldwide at the rate of 5000 acres per day. What will be left of our world in 100 years, or even 50 years, if such technological power is not restricted? Bush's good science. The prognosis is diabolic.
…If religion has failed to convert the hearts of humankind as a species, science has succeeded in placing at the disposal of unconverted hearts power sufficient to destroy or corrupt our very gift of being. Nuclear holocaust might end up as preferable to biologically engineered warfare or endless capitalist/socialist exploitation.
… resolution results from the shamanic/priestly/artistic gift in the world--when such was not separated from science. This inherent "gift", I have come to believe, is a dimension of being. When this capacity is needed to balance, to heal, to save, it is, or can be, raised up….
…The body and soul of a shaman is sensitive and responsive to these conditions (of the world) and its responsibility is to participate creatively in the creative gesture of the Spirit(s’) salvific intentions.
…The point is to strike the sacred fire of the Divine and to startle us awake with our own divine presence. I intend that the shock of such ignition will appease the gods and set at rest the dragons set to devour us with our own unbalanced wit. (You might miss the ‘shock’ if you are not attentive. No matter. It happens anyway. Who?)
The means that initiated this intention were pilgrimage, studies and service. The studies involve an exploration of Shamanism, Buddhism, especially Tantric Buddhism, and the Byzantine Christian Hesychasm--as well as contemporary Roman Catholicism, Christianity in general. Though I have had strong opinions about the differences and similarities of various religious tracts, finally I must leave that discussion in order to effect the salvific and shamanistic act of this project. I seek the way to ignite the Sacred Fire, the Love of God, Nirvanic Bliss, the Heart Sutra, and to sing the silent hymn of the Holy that heals, nourishes, creates, and satisfies.
All of this will leave us, hopefully, watchful and active in the solemn game of God’s delight .
But that was long ago. So much has happened since. Troubling. Very troubling.
No more time. No more time for it. Must be on with the thing itself…
Fundamentalists of every stripe claim that 10% of general population is too high- That the real number of homosexuals is more like 2%. Of course, they have demonstrated the willingness to bend scientific statistics (as well as sacred scriptures) to their PR or economic agenda- as do some of the scriptures! None-the-less, there might be something to the 2%-- as in fiction one can create an effective, evocative scenario that might be more true than history. I'd say the 2% is perhaps the precious gift of the divine androgen, MONK OR NUN OR COMMON MAN/WOMAN --the guide between worlds--sometimes the diabolic hermaphrodite as needed. This figure is a real part of creation as God created it, not the sanitized, right/left, PC, made up, artificial social norms--usually certain breeding couples-- reacting against or dependant upon the memories of a primordial example.
*Crystal cave above the perineum, abode of the Goddess, between the Caribbean and the Yucatan….
THE GREAT OLD MAN IS WITH ME NOW.
THE 'GREAT ROBE MONK.' DARK-- DARK-- POWERFULLY DARK,
but approaching the light that has no shadow—The Nepsis Foundation!
BISHOP, I warned you about the coming scandals and that an inadequate response by the Church would bankrupt us spiritually and fiscally.
Well?
…finally all I see is stillness. Great Spells take years to construct and require the full attention of our core relationships… Don't know what more to say, except to say that what has been said has been heard and once heard the Seraphim who sing the Glory of God in Creation will bring a response--
Of Rectification, Judgment—
of
Jihad!
Of course, there is another way to look at this. There is another figure even older, more primordial than St. Anthony of the Desert who might provide some perspective about Jack's choices—and Simons. This one is described in Rg Veda X, 136:
within him both earth and heaven.
he is indeed Light itself--
The long-haired ascetic.
for a garment. So soon as the gods
of the wind, these silent ascetics.
3. Intoxicated, they say, by our austerities,
we have taken the winds for our steeds.
see nothing except our bodies.
4. He flies through mid-air, the silent ascetic,
beholding the forms of all things.
To every god he has made himself
a friend and collaborator.
Pushed along by the gods,
He is at home in both seas, the east
and the west--the silent ascetic
6. He follows the track of all the spirits,
of nymphs and the deer of the forest.
Understanding their thoughts, bubbling with ecstasies,
their appealing friend is he--
the long-haired ascetic.
7. The wind has prepared and mixed him a drink;
it is pressed by Kunamnama.
of poison--the long-haired ascetic.[1]
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1. Long-haired ascetic: Kesin, the wearer of loose long hair. Fire: visa, poison, poisonous drink, or as here, intoxicating liquor which burns inside like a fire (as confirmed in v. 7). He "carries" earth and heaven, like PrajaPati, to whom he approximates by divinization.
2. Silent ascetics: munis.
3. This stanza is put into he mouths of the munis themselves.
4. Beholding the forms of all things: there is here a double meaning, a spatial one, due to the association with the sun (seeing all things from above) and a more spiritual one (from a higher perspective).
5. The wind: vata. Companion of its blowing: vayu, the divinity of the wind.
6. the spirits, nymphs: Gandharvas and Apsaras.
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VII
The Artist/Writer/Editor does not need claim to ‘work wonders’ or to converse with Dark Spirits, or wear a dress, etc. In this, he simply comments upon his experience of what human perception is capable—what it has been and what it might yet be.
[1] Cistercian Studies, "Christian Monks and Asian Religions" Proceedings of the Second Asian Monastic Congress, Bangalore, October 14 to 22, 1973. Veda X translated by Rev. Dr. Raimon Panikkar. (See VEDIC EXPERIENCE by R. Panikkar.)
